Disfigured and Handicapped

These are the 2 words to describe my feeling now. I was like strucked by a series of mishap that left me 'disfigured' and 'handicapped'. First, the acne breakout on my right cheek which started more than a year ago and later a knee injury which happened about 3 months back.

The last acne breakout I had was when I was a teenager and now this is the 2nd breakout to hit me. Can't believe that it hit me now when before this, I was never even bothered with much skin problem except for some dark spots which appeared after I crossed 30 years old, and acne that easily subside and only pops up once in a blue moon. I wonder why acne is called 'youthful spots' in mandarin when it can hit anyone irregardless of their age...hmm. And thinking back, I suspected my hair had caused this breakout. It all started when I first had my hair cut short to below shoulder level (that was also my first time having a short hair). With this hair length, the end of the hair tends to brush on my cheek. It's either the friction of the hair on the cheek or my dirty hair brushing on my cheek, which started the breakout. It started with one pimple, and then later another one started nearby to it, and later another, and another....and more growing and started spreading. Or is the breakout caused by hormonal change in my body? I don't know, but I guess not, if it is, then why the acne only inflicting on only one side of my cheek, but not all over my face. But recently it had started to spread to another side of my cheek, gosh. For more than a year, I have been suffering from this continuous pop up of fresh pimples every few days on my right cheek. It seems to me more of a bacterial infection, those bacteria is like breeding underneath my skin and getting ready to infect my skin anytime....sigh. But I was very very lucky that it subsided a little before my wedding but that was because I control very very hard not to prick or touch them. I got very itchy fingers that tend to prick at them especially when it had dried up and hardened at the top....I need to control myself and not let the fingers touching my face anymore!!!. But now, it got worst and the only nightmare now is whether those scars will become permanent....... sigh. Why so many women out there have smooth and good skin one? I envy leh. Is it because of my diet? My sis said it's likely due to my diet. I don't deny I have bad eating habits... I like fried food and junk food. I used to be on junk food eating spree almost every weekend....the whole can of pringles or mister potato would be finished while watching tv, or the big packet of RM3 Twisties all gone within hours. I also tend to eat more meat than vegetables, and not taking enough fruits. But how come last time my diet also that bad mah, and yet no pimples one...sigh. Or is it because I don't go for facial? Or is it because when young that time I don't take care of my skin? Can anyone with good skin share with me your secret?

And little did I know that our knees can be so fragile until I injured myself 3 months ago when i hiked down a hill. I hopped and ran all the way down the steep tar road at the Tokun hill in Bukit Mertajam, when it started to rain heavily, until we reached the foot of the hill. It was quite a long journey down the hill because we tooked 45 minutes to hike up there. I still didn't realize I had injured my knee because all I thought was that it was a normal after-hiking pain. A few days later, I went to the gym and continued sprinting on the threadmill with the pain on my knee. I only realized that I might have injured my knee when the pain did not subside after a week, plus it was not the usual pain that I experienced after my usual exercise routine. I had pain when walking down the stairs or when walking too frequent or too fast. I found myself limping instead when I tried to walk fast. Gosh...i felt like handicapped! I went to see a orthopaedic in Gleneagles and the doctor diagnosed my injury as 'Chondromalacia'. It's an injury of the cartilage. Cartilage is the soft tissue that lines the bones in joints, which acts as 'shock absorbers' to absorb the impact of the upper leg on the lower leg and also help to improve smooth movement of the knee. I was given a daily dosage of 1500mg of glucosamine sulfate and some B12 vitamins. My injury has been almost 3 months and I have taken the supplements for a month already, and I still have this pain, although it had got better slightly. My worst fear would be whether the injury will become permanent or whether it will render my knee weaker and not sustainable anymore for my usual intense training in the gym. This will be my next worst nightmare. I felt so sad now that I cannot go exercise coz all this while, I never missed not going to the gym more than a week or two. I would always dragged myself to the gym at least once a week, no matter how busy or tired or hungry I am, or even if it is past 8 at night and haven't had my dinner. For almost 3 months now without exercising, I felt flabby all over, especially my butt which gets bigger and heavier...sigh. Also, I felt less energetic and I bet my cholestrol level is at its peak now with my current eating habit.